[All things considered it would probably be easier to calm down if they would just let go of each other-- but then that would mean letting go of each other, and Adrian is loath to do that just yet. It would be more awkward than not to sit on opposite ends of the couch and not look at each other, after all, and quite simply, it feels nice to still be pressed close like this.
In, hm, several ways; he's not not hard, but he's trying very diligently not to move too much, so as not to draw attention to it. Felix is already in his lap, so he's failed step one, but like, maybe step two (continue to not fidget) is achievable. He's trying.
He thinks he can piece together that flustered non-sentence, though, because he chuckles lightly and says,] So are you.
[With the way he's sitting, there are even so many very kissable parts of Felix just inches away, and it would be so very easy to rile him up again, but-- slow. Slow and steady.]
We don't have to, you know, do anything, [he says, soft and quiet. They've already pulled the brake, but he feels like it's worth saying it out loud, properly, just like the part about how much experience either of them has-- there are no demands or expectations here. Just earnest bumbling, honestly.]
[Oh, there's not a fraction of a chance Felix is letting go now. You've unlocked clingy Felix and now he's stuck to you like a baby koala, sorry Adrian.
That little quip makes Felix smile, and he turns his face into Adrian's neck to press very soft kisses there. His fingers play with and stroke the back of his hair in small movements.
He appreciates Adrian's reassurance. He's feeling around in the dark, here- the older man's explicit guidance is certainly needed. He considers the options Adrian presents.]
I want it. Want you-- bad.
[He breathes it against Adrian's neck.]
But...
[But, well, emotional vulnerability is one of his least favourite things, and having sex with Adrian would definitely open up more of it. He trusts Adrian, but this is still new. He wants to make sure it's not going to crash and burn somehow before he puts all of himself on the line.
Well, maybe it's already too late. But part of him needs that control, over at least the timing, if he can't control how deeply he cares about Adrian.]
It's new. A bit...
[Scary.]
I just need to get used to it.
[That's not to say he won't jump Adrian's bones the next time they're alone in a room together, like, tomorrow. He reserves that right. But for now, he hangs onto his sliver of self-control.]
[Ah, and it's somehow that combination-- the soft affection and the direct words, whole sentences!-- that makes Adrian blush brightly, huffing out a laugh that's mostly nerves. It's different hearing it directly, even if, well, he already could tell. There's still a part of him that isn't used to being wanted, anymore, so it's... more solid, to hear it and experience it. Solid, good, real.
And he blushes all the way to his ears about it, but that's just a sacrifice he'll have to make. He tilts his head to welcome more of those kisses, trailing a finger over Felix's back in lazy, loopy shapes.]
Of course. I'll be here.
[For both talking about feelings and getting his bones jumped, whichever, whenever. He shifts, keeping Felix close up against him, to turn sideways and lie back across the couch more comfortably. It's not the smoothest operation so please work with him here, it'll be comfortable in a second--
[There's still a smile on his lips as his nose traces meandering lines on the column of Adrian's neck. Here it is: you've slowly chipped away at all Felix's hard and weird layers, and you've finally found the gooey centre. Bask in it while it lasts- it might harden again at any moment.
Oh, they're moving, and thankfully he's not being pushed off, just re-positioned. Even the act of Adrian moving both of their bodies at once sends a small surge of warm desire through him again, thinking of all the ways in the future Adrian might position him, the ways their bodies might move against each other, whether for sex or just... Perhaps sharing a bed. What would that be like? It sounds incredibly nice; he's not immune to wanting that kind of comfort.
He moves to lay at Adrian's side, but half of him is still draped over his roommate, knee bent over his thighs, hand coming up to cradle the opposite side of Adrian's neck and jaw. He gazes for a long moment at the dark mark on this side of his face, only partially covered by his facial hair- then kisses it softly.]
Anything. Your pick.
[With the people he's soft for, he tends to be curious. He always wants to know more about Adrian, and there are things to be learned about him through the story he tells. But there could also be something illuminating about what Adrian chooses to tell to Felix about him when invited to say literally anything. Any story, ever in his life-- what will stand out, what will seem important to share? Felix bets it'll be magic-related, but he wonders if he might be surprised.]
[Oh, this is absolutely tender and saccharine, and Adrian isn't complaining at all. Being stuck with Felix sounds lovely, no matter how many prickly layers he has at any given time-- Adrian has stuck around for those already, he won't be shying away from Felix's moods now. Gods know he's not a walk in the park himself, always running headfirst into the next opportunity to do something terrible to himself in the name of magic practice...
They're stuck with each other, it seems. He keeps one arm hooked around Felix and skims his fingers up and down Felix's arm with the other. He's downright cozy, thinking only of wasting away the rest of the day curled up like this, until they decide to wile away the rest of the evening in somebody's bed, perhaps. He'll tell stories until his voice gives out if that's what it takes.
There's a moment where, becoming aware Felix is staring at his mark, the coziness dips dangerously, and he's a heartbeat away from squirming uncomfortably into a new position, maybe just yanking Felix over to his other side, when, oh! A kiss. Of course it's a kiss, because Felix has accepted even the worst part of him without any objections, or uncomfortable curiosities, or any of the usual routine.
Immediately, he tears up. He tries to blink back the hazy rush of tears to no avail, and has to scrub a hand over his face with a mumbled,] Sorry, I-- hold on a second.
[He's good, he's fine, it's nothing-- He gives Felix a tight squeeze and takes a deep breath. Tears aside, he'll be riding the high of that simple kiss for the next small age. Always a plus.
Story time.]
My student, the one who-- [is in some kind of mysterious trouble, mmm,] You know. Her name is Helena, although after she started learning the rapier, she insisted on being called Bee.
[A pause, like, obviously. The stinger. Felix is a sword guy, he gets it. She's ridiculous, but isn't that also adorable? Kids!]
I think you would like her, she's... spirited. Very dedicated. There was one time I had her practicing how to handle a larger enemy, and the first thing she did was climb the lattice in her parents' garden and leap at the training dummy from above.
[Adrian has accepted Felix for all the terrible things he is and has never once judged him. Calling your friend a boar? Fine. Defecting and killing your father? Wow, gotcha. Being generally rude and pissy? All good. The least Felix can do is try his best to understand Adrian in turn, and accept him even when he doesn't fully get it. Even when he's being reckless and hurting himself.
His eyes widen slightly as he sees Adrian lose composure, and then his brow creases with concern.]
What's wrong?
[He murmurs it quietly. Even after Adrian had to kill a bunch of innocent people, and see a little girl die, he didn't cry- Felix isn't sure what caused it to happen now.
He moves his face back slightly to regard Adrian's face as he tells the story. Yes, he remembers this student. He smiles at her self-imposed alias, and huffs a small laugh at the end there. She sounds... A lot like a younger Felix.]
Yes. I'd like her.
[Oh!]
Someone told me that time back home is on pause while we're here. So at least you know nothing bad is happening to her at the moment.
[She'll still be in trouble when Adrian gets back, but for now, at least.
Which makes his mind wander to whether Adrian will want to go home, and whether he'll want to go home (probably not), and their eventual possible separation from each other. Hm. Something to ponder... Later. Not right now.]
[He's fine now! He only cried for a few seconds, and while he'll probably open up more about that someday, he doesn't want to spend this time talking about his curse-based insecurities. Later, later. He turns his head to give Felix a smile, see! All fine!
But, good, perhaps the leaders will think it prudent to bring a teenage girl here and little Bee will be rescued from her mysterious fate and he won't ever have to worry about what's happened to her again, because she'll be right here, most likely, badgering him about getting her new equipment--
Wait.]
What? On... pause. And that's a certainty? Someone found out?
[That would mean-- does it mean she's aware of being "on pause," wherever she is-- no, it couldn't be that. So then it can be a relief, a tension going out of him at once, making him pull Felix in close and curl in against him, tucking his head against Felix's shoulder. He might tear up again, but at least this time it won't be difficult to figure out why.]
[Felix just looks at Adrian for a long moment, trying to assess whether he's really okay- but he smiles, and it seems genuine enough. Felix isn't the kind to pry, anyway, so he'll let it go.]
Yes. I think it's just a fact of things here. Those who have been here a while know stuff like that. It pauses when they take you out, and then eventually they put you right back at the exact time you left, so it's like you were never gone. Unless you choose to stay here permanently.
[That information has the intended effect on Adrian- he'd been meaning to tell him, because Felix knew he'd be relieved. He curls up into Felix, and something about it is so... Vulnerable, so sweet. Felix feels a strong urge to protect this person, and it shows in the way he wraps his arms around him completely, as though shielding him from something.]
Yeah. Of course.
[More than protection, he truly wants Adrian to be happy. Not just happy with Felix, though selfishly that would be nice- he wants Adrian to have his own life, be his own man, and feel fulfilled in that. Work past these things that weigh him down, and work toward things that bring him joy and make him feel confident.
He deserves to be confident.
Of course, Felix doesn't say any of this... Words are hard, and it would just make him feel even more vulnerable than he's already been all day today. So he kisses his hair and lets his hands do the talking- rubbing Adrian's back, smoothing over his shoulders, stroking his hair. At one point, his fingertips catching on something on his skin behind his ear, and they pause there to feel it more closely. It's not a zit, it's not even made of skin- it's hard, like metal or something.]
[Were Adrian focused enough to be skeptical, he might wonder-- how come the leaders don't simply use that same magic here, in their own world, to solve their problems while keeping them at bay? But he's only thinking of the immense weight lifted from his shoulders, of the gift of time and of not feeling a pang of guilt every time he thinks he's happier here than he was back home.
Because he is. Happier. Yes, there is the issue of Bee, of course, and he has a responsibility to do something about that, but the rest? No one here treats him like a pariah. His magic has returned, albeit not in the most ideal way. Most shockingly of all he has Felix, who cares for him and wraps around him like this, like he is something worth cherishing.
So, really. If not for the one big problem, bully to the university and the city and all the rest. He supposes he'd miss his parents.
But he's getting distracted. Felix's fingers brush the stone behind his ear and it reacts, although only to Adrian, pulsing out a dim energy like it's a thing awake with its own heartbeat. The return of his magic has of course meant the stone is restored, too-- he had felt it stir on that same day and ignored it; it's no use to him here.]
That's the spider, [he says, like that means literally anything, and then corrects himself, leaning his head back some so as not to mumble everything into Felix's shoulder,] That's what we called it. It's from the university. Everyone in the cohort had one-- it connected us.
[Felix is happier here, too. Back home he was just... Running. Constantly evading his own emotions, grief, and other people. Here, he's been forced to reset, to do something different. Perhaps he'll still be running, in a way, but in a more enjoyable way? Or perhaps he will actually be able to face all of his baggage from the past. He's already done a bit of that, anyway.
In any case, he won't be alone. He won't be allowed to isolate himself, and that's probably for the best, since it's already doing wonders just to have Adrian and the animals around.
That explanation of the stone... Okay, cool, so that's terrifying and makes no sense to Felix. Say more about that.]
Is it? It came part and parcel with the program. You should have seen the way a handful of university students can annoy each other with something like this.
[He's even a bit nostalgic; up until the end, he had a great time at school-- he misses it, and the cohort, what's left of them.
Still, they did call it the spider. He knows it's at least a little odd, as a thing to have implanted at school.
But no matter, because Felix leaning over him is a brilliant unintentional distraction, and Adrian can't resist twisting and leaning up to kiss him on the cheek. Observing his head spider? No; kisses, actually.]
Sounds torturous. If Garreg Mach did this to us, I probably would have cut it out of me.
[At the stolen cheek kiss, he looks at Adrian as though he just caught him doing something naughty. But it's teasing, and then he catches his lips in another kiss, and then another long one, as he sinks back down into the couch again, into Adrian's embrace. This kissing shit is very nice- now that he's done it once, he just wants to do it forever.]
[Not without, you know, death. That's the only reason Adrian still has his after being kicked out of the university; they didn't want him around, but they weren't going to kill him over it. The enchanted cuff had kept it dormant, besides.
More importantly, Felix giving him that look; he laughs and melts into that series of kisses, sliding his hand up to rest on the back of Felix's neck. He could get used to this himself-- and hopefully he will, at least insomuch as they're going to be doing it much more regularly. Will he ever actually get completely used to it, the little flutter in his chest when their lips connect and the warmth spreading up his neck into his cheeks? Tough to say; he has a feeling that lightly giddy feeling won't go away, and honestly, he thinks he prefers it like that.
Now he should definitely say something cool and suave, here goes,]
I would like that for-- you? And also me. [Yes. Nailed it.]
[Wow, you try to say a nice thing to a guy and you get called a dweeb for it. Adrian huffs, not bothered though; he's actually going to try again, ahem,]
Yes, but I'm your dweeb?
[Can he say that? Is that allowed? He flushes pink about it all the same, tugging Felix down for one more kiss. Sharing a bed sounds like the most logical next step, especially given how he doesn't even want to get up from this couch.]
[He scrunches his nose, still slightly smiling. But he'd be loathe to miss this opportunity to stake his claim.]
But yes. You are.
[He knits his hand into brown hair atop Adrian's head. Yes, he will take responsibility for this dweeby magic idiot man. The best cat co-parent, the most tolerable roommate, the most patient friend... And now, his. Property of Felix Hugo Fraldarius: Do Not Touch Unless You Want A Sword In The Gut.]
Good. I should sleep early.
[He still feels like he has a mild plague, after all.]
[Gross... maybe a little. Please allow him at least one (1) gooey, saccharine moment for free per day, starting with that one. Not that that was the first, and honestly it won't ever be just one obscenely tender moment per day, but! Details. He gets that one for free.
Adrian presses one more quick kiss to his lips like putting a tidy little bow on that, there-- gross sappy moment complete.]
Hmm, you should. I'll make some tea. All you need to do is focus on resting.
[He's definitely allowed at least one per day. Felix will pretend to hate it, but it's all lies. He likes it.
Adrian is being so sweet today, and while that's not as surprising as Felix being sweet, Felix still feels somewhat in awe of it. He'd had himself convinced that maybe this was nothing, or maybe it was one-sided. Just Felix pining for a man who was nice enough to agree to live with him. But suddenly it's returned in a way he cannot doubt or deny the intent of, there's no way to brush it off as simply Adrian being nice, and it's a wave of... What can only be described as happiness. If there were another word for it, he'd use that, but unfortunately there isn't.]
... Thank you, Adrian. For everything.
[He speaks with a quiet seriousness, then plants a soft kiss to his lips. He rarely says anything like this, so he wants to make sure he knows it's sincere.]
[Oh, that's a rarity; and while Adrian's instinct is to say there's nothing Felix has to thank him for, he doesn't. He understands the sentiment, where the urge to give thanks is coming from, and honestly if Felix hadn't said it first, he might have said it later himself.
So, instead, after a content little hum against Felix's lips,] Of course. All for you.
[Picking him up from the clinic, taking care of him, each moment of doting affection-- and, granted, it's not all for Felix, because plenty of it is for Adrian himself, but still. He's happy, too, and it makes him happy to see Felix happy, and around and around it goes.]
Do you want to go to the other room?
[To bed, specifically, but not, like, to bed to sleep or otherwise. Just, well, there's more room there than this couch to keep doing exactly this same thing they're doing right now.]
[All for you. Felix takes Adrian's face in his hands and kisses him deeply again. This time it's anything but hungry or mashing. It's slow and long, and there is definite passion, but it's not lust. It's surely something deeper than that.
Once he pulls back and Adrian asks the question, he nods and hums. Felix does want this man in his bed promptly, yes please, if only to do more of this.
He pushes himself up from the couch to stand, slowly and with a small wince for his still-aching body. He tugs Adrian by the hand to the bedroom, feeling a bit giddy as he does, because there may have been some nights in recent memory where he'd wanted this to happen, but wasn't sure it ever would.
Simply to get comfortable, he strips off most of his outer layers until he's just in underclothes, revealing more of his lean-muscled, scarred frame than he usually shows. He crawls under the covers, and is immediately joined on the bed by their tabby.]
[Oh, and if Felix is going to kiss him like that, he's going to say all kinds saccharine, emotional things ten times as often. No question. That kiss is practically hypnotic, and he's moving to follow Felix off the couch and down the hall like he's walking on air.
For an extra few seconds he simply watches Felix undress, a little mesmerized, a lot appreciative of the sight-- they're just going to tangle up again, he knows, but far be it from him to not admire the view. Felix is all stern angles and expertly honed musculature, strength in every sinew, and it's somehow the perfect juxtaposition to see him crawl into bed to cuddle a cat.
Only a few seconds of ogling though, during which Adrian resolves to draw himself a mental map of every muscle and every scar on Felix sooner rather than later, with hands and lips and teeth-- no doubt he will need to take his sweet time with it. Soon. Sometime. For now he follows suit and undresses; he's not quite as lean or as scarred as Felix, he simply hasn't been a swordsman for as long, and what visible lasting scars he has do look more like magical mishaps during fire training than actual battle wounds. At least one of them is even embarrassing. After taking a moment to look around and drape his clothes over a chair (this is not prissy, this is tidy, ahem), before he climbs into bed and scoots in close with an arm thrown over Felix and cat both. Hey.]
Don't let me forget about making tea later. [He will not forget, actually the challenge will be to convince him he doesn't need to get fully dressed again to walk out to their kitchen.]
[Amber eyes peer from the bed up at Adrian as he undresses. It's not exactly subtle, the way his hungry gaze pores over his roommate's frame. In this moment, he isn't sure if he's ever seen someone more attractive, and heat pools in his gut again. This is... Certainly something to get used to, desire being so accessible on the surface rather than buried deep, and having to restrain himself from jumping Adrian's bones at every opportunity.
The corner of his lip picks up into a smirk as Adrian neatly sets down his clothing, whereas Felix's clothes are crumpled on the floor. Not prissy, exactly, but tidy, conscientious, perhaps a touch neurotic. An endearing quirk.
Felix snakes his arms around Adrian's waist and curls into him, burrowing into a cave of covers and cat and warm, lovely man.
Safe. For once, totally safe.]
Mm.
[Felix couldn't care less about the tea; in fact he could fall asleep here and now. His breathing evens as he closes his eyes.]
[Hopefully Felix really enjoys watching him tidy his clothes in his underthings, because that's going to keep happening the more times they do this. He wraps his arms tighter around Felix and ducks his head to kiss his hair while his heart turns over from how precious Felix is, cat included. It's really important to have that tea, and a real meal...
But later, Adrian supposes. He's too fond and his heart is too full to object.]
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In, hm, several ways; he's not not hard, but he's trying very diligently not to move too much, so as not to draw attention to it. Felix is already in his lap, so he's failed step one, but like, maybe step two (continue to not fidget) is achievable. He's trying.
He thinks he can piece together that flustered non-sentence, though, because he chuckles lightly and says,] So are you.
[With the way he's sitting, there are even so many very kissable parts of Felix just inches away, and it would be so very easy to rile him up again, but-- slow. Slow and steady.]
We don't have to, you know, do anything, [he says, soft and quiet. They've already pulled the brake, but he feels like it's worth saying it out loud, properly, just like the part about how much experience either of them has-- there are no demands or expectations here. Just earnest bumbling, honestly.]
We could talk, or... talk later.
[Could just sit in silence!]
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That little quip makes Felix smile, and he turns his face into Adrian's neck to press very soft kisses there. His fingers play with and stroke the back of his hair in small movements.
He appreciates Adrian's reassurance. He's feeling around in the dark, here- the older man's explicit guidance is certainly needed. He considers the options Adrian presents.]
I want it. Want you-- bad.
[He breathes it against Adrian's neck.]
But...
[But, well, emotional vulnerability is one of his least favourite things, and having sex with Adrian would definitely open up more of it. He trusts Adrian, but this is still new. He wants to make sure it's not going to crash and burn somehow before he puts all of himself on the line.
Well, maybe it's already too late. But part of him needs that control, over at least the timing, if he can't control how deeply he cares about Adrian.]
It's new. A bit...
[Scary.]
I just need to get used to it.
[That's not to say he won't jump Adrian's bones the next time they're alone in a room together, like, tomorrow. He reserves that right. But for now, he hangs onto his sliver of self-control.]
Talk to me? Tell me a story. Or something.
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And he blushes all the way to his ears about it, but that's just a sacrifice he'll have to make. He tilts his head to welcome more of those kisses, trailing a finger over Felix's back in lazy, loopy shapes.]
Of course. I'll be here.
[For both talking about feelings and getting his bones jumped, whichever, whenever. He shifts, keeping Felix close up against him, to turn sideways and lie back across the couch more comfortably. It's not the smoothest operation so please work with him here, it'll be comfortable in a second--
Okay. Mmph.]
What kind of story?
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[There's still a smile on his lips as his nose traces meandering lines on the column of Adrian's neck. Here it is: you've slowly chipped away at all Felix's hard and weird layers, and you've finally found the gooey centre. Bask in it while it lasts- it might harden again at any moment.
Oh, they're moving, and thankfully he's not being pushed off, just re-positioned. Even the act of Adrian moving both of their bodies at once sends a small surge of warm desire through him again, thinking of all the ways in the future Adrian might position him, the ways their bodies might move against each other, whether for sex or just... Perhaps sharing a bed. What would that be like? It sounds incredibly nice; he's not immune to wanting that kind of comfort.
He moves to lay at Adrian's side, but half of him is still draped over his roommate, knee bent over his thighs, hand coming up to cradle the opposite side of Adrian's neck and jaw. He gazes for a long moment at the dark mark on this side of his face, only partially covered by his facial hair- then kisses it softly.]
Anything. Your pick.
[With the people he's soft for, he tends to be curious. He always wants to know more about Adrian, and there are things to be learned about him through the story he tells. But there could also be something illuminating about what Adrian chooses to tell to Felix about him when invited to say literally anything. Any story, ever in his life-- what will stand out, what will seem important to share? Felix bets it'll be magic-related, but he wonders if he might be surprised.]
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They're stuck with each other, it seems. He keeps one arm hooked around Felix and skims his fingers up and down Felix's arm with the other. He's downright cozy, thinking only of wasting away the rest of the day curled up like this, until they decide to wile away the rest of the evening in somebody's bed, perhaps. He'll tell stories until his voice gives out if that's what it takes.
There's a moment where, becoming aware Felix is staring at his mark, the coziness dips dangerously, and he's a heartbeat away from squirming uncomfortably into a new position, maybe just yanking Felix over to his other side, when, oh! A kiss. Of course it's a kiss, because Felix has accepted even the worst part of him without any objections, or uncomfortable curiosities, or any of the usual routine.
Immediately, he tears up. He tries to blink back the hazy rush of tears to no avail, and has to scrub a hand over his face with a mumbled,] Sorry, I-- hold on a second.
[He's good, he's fine, it's nothing-- He gives Felix a tight squeeze and takes a deep breath. Tears aside, he'll be riding the high of that simple kiss for the next small age. Always a plus.
Story time.]
My student, the one who-- [is in some kind of mysterious trouble, mmm,] You know. Her name is Helena, although after she started learning the rapier, she insisted on being called Bee.
[A pause, like, obviously. The stinger. Felix is a sword guy, he gets it. She's ridiculous, but isn't that also adorable? Kids!]
I think you would like her, she's... spirited. Very dedicated. There was one time I had her practicing how to handle a larger enemy, and the first thing she did was climb the lattice in her parents' garden and leap at the training dummy from above.
[Perfect strategy, no notes.]
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His eyes widen slightly as he sees Adrian lose composure, and then his brow creases with concern.]
What's wrong?
[He murmurs it quietly. Even after Adrian had to kill a bunch of innocent people, and see a little girl die, he didn't cry- Felix isn't sure what caused it to happen now.
He moves his face back slightly to regard Adrian's face as he tells the story. Yes, he remembers this student. He smiles at her self-imposed alias, and huffs a small laugh at the end there. She sounds... A lot like a younger Felix.]
Yes. I'd like her.
[Oh!]
Someone told me that time back home is on pause while we're here. So at least you know nothing bad is happening to her at the moment.
[She'll still be in trouble when Adrian gets back, but for now, at least.
Which makes his mind wander to whether Adrian will want to go home, and whether he'll want to go home (probably not), and their eventual possible separation from each other. Hm. Something to ponder... Later. Not right now.]
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[He's fine now! He only cried for a few seconds, and while he'll probably open up more about that someday, he doesn't want to spend this time talking about his curse-based insecurities. Later, later. He turns his head to give Felix a smile, see! All fine!
But, good, perhaps the leaders will think it prudent to bring a teenage girl here and little Bee will be rescued from her mysterious fate and he won't ever have to worry about what's happened to her again, because she'll be right here, most likely, badgering him about getting her new equipment--
Wait.]
What? On... pause. And that's a certainty? Someone found out?
[That would mean-- does it mean she's aware of being "on pause," wherever she is-- no, it couldn't be that. So then it can be a relief, a tension going out of him at once, making him pull Felix in close and curl in against him, tucking his head against Felix's shoulder. He might tear up again, but at least this time it won't be difficult to figure out why.]
Thank you for letting me know.
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Yes. I think it's just a fact of things here. Those who have been here a while know stuff like that. It pauses when they take you out, and then eventually they put you right back at the exact time you left, so it's like you were never gone. Unless you choose to stay here permanently.
[That information has the intended effect on Adrian- he'd been meaning to tell him, because Felix knew he'd be relieved. He curls up into Felix, and something about it is so... Vulnerable, so sweet. Felix feels a strong urge to protect this person, and it shows in the way he wraps his arms around him completely, as though shielding him from something.]
Yeah. Of course.
[More than protection, he truly wants Adrian to be happy. Not just happy with Felix, though selfishly that would be nice- he wants Adrian to have his own life, be his own man, and feel fulfilled in that. Work past these things that weigh him down, and work toward things that bring him joy and make him feel confident.
He deserves to be confident.
Of course, Felix doesn't say any of this... Words are hard, and it would just make him feel even more vulnerable than he's already been all day today. So he kisses his hair and lets his hands do the talking- rubbing Adrian's back, smoothing over his shoulders, stroking his hair. At one point, his fingertips catching on something on his skin behind his ear, and they pause there to feel it more closely. It's not a zit, it's not even made of skin- it's hard, like metal or something.]
What-... What is this?
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Because he is. Happier. Yes, there is the issue of Bee, of course, and he has a responsibility to do something about that, but the rest? No one here treats him like a pariah. His magic has returned, albeit not in the most ideal way. Most shockingly of all he has Felix, who cares for him and wraps around him like this, like he is something worth cherishing.
So, really. If not for the one big problem, bully to the university and the city and all the rest. He supposes he'd miss his parents.
But he's getting distracted. Felix's fingers brush the stone behind his ear and it reacts, although only to Adrian, pulsing out a dim energy like it's a thing awake with its own heartbeat. The return of his magic has of course meant the stone is restored, too-- he had felt it stir on that same day and ignored it; it's no use to him here.]
That's the spider, [he says, like that means literally anything, and then corrects himself, leaning his head back some so as not to mumble everything into Felix's shoulder,] That's what we called it. It's from the university. Everyone in the cohort had one-- it connected us.
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In any case, he won't be alone. He won't be allowed to isolate himself, and that's probably for the best, since it's already doing wonders just to have Adrian and the animals around.
That explanation of the stone... Okay, cool, so that's terrifying and makes no sense to Felix. Say more about that.]
What? What do you mean? For communication?
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Adrian looks at him for an extra beat, as if only now cluing in that, oh, it's a strange thing to have, isn't it. Aha. Well.]
Yes, mostly... It's a bit of a magic amplifier, too. Not that it will do anything now, when it's only me in this world. Now it's basically jewelry.
[Basically.]
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That's... Creepy.
[His school. Implanted a thing into his skull. To communicate with other students and amplify their magic. It's cool, but also, what the fuck.
Felix leans over Adrian to look at it. Huh.]
How fashionable.
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[He's even a bit nostalgic; up until the end, he had a great time at school-- he misses it, and the cohort, what's left of them.
Still, they did call it the spider. He knows it's at least a little odd, as a thing to have implanted at school.
But no matter, because Felix leaning over him is a brilliant unintentional distraction, and Adrian can't resist twisting and leaning up to kiss him on the cheek. Observing his head spider? No; kisses, actually.]
Cw joking reference to self harm
Sounds torturous. If Garreg Mach did this to us, I probably would have cut it out of me.
[At the stolen cheek kiss, he looks at Adrian as though he just caught him doing something naughty. But it's teasing, and then he catches his lips in another kiss, and then another long one, as he sinks back down into the couch again, into Adrian's embrace. This kissing shit is very nice- now that he's done it once, he just wants to do it forever.]
I could get used to this.
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[Not without, you know, death. That's the only reason Adrian still has his after being kicked out of the university; they didn't want him around, but they weren't going to kill him over it. The enchanted cuff had kept it dormant, besides.
More importantly, Felix giving him that look; he laughs and melts into that series of kisses, sliding his hand up to rest on the back of Felix's neck. He could get used to this himself-- and hopefully he will, at least insomuch as they're going to be doing it much more regularly. Will he ever actually get completely used to it, the little flutter in his chest when their lips connect and the warmth spreading up his neck into his cheeks? Tough to say; he has a feeling that lightly giddy feeling won't go away, and honestly, he thinks he prefers it like that.
Now he should definitely say something cool and suave, here goes,]
I would like that for-- you? And also me. [Yes. Nailed it.]
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You're a dweeb.
[Another kiss. And in case he's offended by that,]
A cute one, though, I guess.
[He looks at Adrian's lips once again with a hint of hunger.]
Sleep in my bed tonight. Please.
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Yes, but I'm your dweeb?
[Can he say that? Is that allowed? He flushes pink about it all the same, tugging Felix down for one more kiss. Sharing a bed sounds like the most logical next step, especially given how he doesn't even want to get up from this couch.]
I'd like that.
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[He scrunches his nose, still slightly smiling. But he'd be loathe to miss this opportunity to stake his claim.]
But yes. You are.
[He knits his hand into brown hair atop Adrian's head. Yes, he will take responsibility for this dweeby magic idiot man. The best cat co-parent, the most tolerable roommate, the most patient friend... And now, his. Property of Felix Hugo Fraldarius: Do Not Touch Unless You Want A Sword In The Gut.]
Good. I should sleep early.
[He still feels like he has a mild plague, after all.]
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Adrian presses one more quick kiss to his lips like putting a tidy little bow on that, there-- gross sappy moment complete.]
Hmm, you should. I'll make some tea. All you need to do is focus on resting.
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Adrian is being so sweet today, and while that's not as surprising as Felix being sweet, Felix still feels somewhat in awe of it. He'd had himself convinced that maybe this was nothing, or maybe it was one-sided. Just Felix pining for a man who was nice enough to agree to live with him. But suddenly it's returned in a way he cannot doubt or deny the intent of, there's no way to brush it off as simply Adrian being nice, and it's a wave of... What can only be described as happiness. If there were another word for it, he'd use that, but unfortunately there isn't.]
... Thank you, Adrian. For everything.
[He speaks with a quiet seriousness, then plants a soft kiss to his lips. He rarely says anything like this, so he wants to make sure he knows it's sincere.]
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So, instead, after a content little hum against Felix's lips,] Of course. All for you.
[Picking him up from the clinic, taking care of him, each moment of doting affection-- and, granted, it's not all for Felix, because plenty of it is for Adrian himself, but still. He's happy, too, and it makes him happy to see Felix happy, and around and around it goes.]
Do you want to go to the other room?
[To bed, specifically, but not, like, to bed to sleep or otherwise. Just, well, there's more room there than this couch to keep doing exactly this same thing they're doing right now.]
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Once he pulls back and Adrian asks the question, he nods and hums. Felix does want this man in his bed promptly, yes please, if only to do more of this.
He pushes himself up from the couch to stand, slowly and with a small wince for his still-aching body. He tugs Adrian by the hand to the bedroom, feeling a bit giddy as he does, because there may have been some nights in recent memory where he'd wanted this to happen, but wasn't sure it ever would.
Simply to get comfortable, he strips off most of his outer layers until he's just in underclothes, revealing more of his lean-muscled, scarred frame than he usually shows. He crawls under the covers, and is immediately joined on the bed by their tabby.]
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For an extra few seconds he simply watches Felix undress, a little mesmerized, a lot appreciative of the sight-- they're just going to tangle up again, he knows, but far be it from him to not admire the view. Felix is all stern angles and expertly honed musculature, strength in every sinew, and it's somehow the perfect juxtaposition to see him crawl into bed to cuddle a cat.
Only a few seconds of ogling though, during which Adrian resolves to draw himself a mental map of every muscle and every scar on Felix sooner rather than later, with hands and lips and teeth-- no doubt he will need to take his sweet time with it. Soon. Sometime. For now he follows suit and undresses; he's not quite as lean or as scarred as Felix, he simply hasn't been a swordsman for as long, and what visible lasting scars he has do look more like magical mishaps during fire training than actual battle wounds. At least one of them is even embarrassing. After taking a moment to look around and drape his clothes over a chair (this is not prissy, this is tidy, ahem), before he climbs into bed and scoots in close with an arm thrown over Felix and cat both. Hey.]
Don't let me forget about making tea later. [He will not forget, actually the challenge will be to convince him he doesn't need to get fully dressed again to walk out to their kitchen.]
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The corner of his lip picks up into a smirk as Adrian neatly sets down his clothing, whereas Felix's clothes are crumpled on the floor. Not prissy, exactly, but tidy, conscientious, perhaps a touch neurotic. An endearing quirk.
Felix snakes his arms around Adrian's waist and curls into him, burrowing into a cave of covers and cat and warm, lovely man.
Safe. For once, totally safe.]
Mm.
[Felix couldn't care less about the tea; in fact he could fall asleep here and now. His breathing evens as he closes his eyes.]
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But later, Adrian supposes. He's too fond and his heart is too full to object.]
Oh, alright. Get some sleep.
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